why I love hillbillies

My first experience with county fairs didn’t come until I was in high school. My boyfriend and his group of friends raced demolition derby cars and I would spend my summers anticipating him winning as I stood and watched from the sidelines. I’d watch each heat of cars as the mud would go flying in the air praying there wasn’t a fire and that he would finish the night’s derby safely without having to jump out of his car. I don’t remember having a bad view of the people at the fair but I remember viewing them as hillbillies. Now before you go judging me on this, I have never thought of a hillbilly as a negative thing. Honestly. The people I met at the fair were always kind to me and struck me as the kind of people who didn’t care at all what they looked like. They were friendly, would chat with you all night long and weren’t stuck up at all. I liked them and I enjoyed spending time around them. I genuinely loved going to county fairs with him and watching him race. Meeting new people from all around the state was a lot of fun for me with him by my side. I loved hearing the stories they would tell of the effort they put into preparing these cars and watching their children play at the fair as they raced. My husband and his buddies spent all summer getting their cars ready and racing them and I took part in as much of it as he and his friends would let me. I wanted to soak up as much of him as I could and if that meant helping get derby cars ready, I did it, if that meant going to fairs, I rode along. At one point my friend and I even made shirts that said “Save a car, ride a driver”. I know, we were classy. But it was a fun part of my life, hey fair people….hillbillies, whatever you want to call them, are fun people! You get to hang out with animals, watch demolition derbies, go on rides, eat delicious food (nobody said it was healthy) , watch the kids play on the playground, and just have a good time together. It reminds me of the atmosphere at the campground. Many nights we would spend all day driving to a fair, wait in line to check in, walk around eating funnel cakes and drinking lemonade shake ups, go on some rides, watch the guys participate in the derby, drive half way home, stop at a Monicals for pizza, drive the rest of the way home, and then camp out at someones house and sit around a fire and have a few beers. And so went many of my summers after high school.

derby

Once we had kids of our own, the demo derby lifestyle has taken a backseat and we haven’t been to any county fairs in quite a while as our own children aren’t old enough to participate as far as showing livestock or projects independently yet. But this year we were determined not to miss out on the county fair. My husband really wanted to take our kids to see the rodeo. I hadn’t even seen a rodeo before so I was pretty excited to be going for the first time. As the day went on, our chances of getting to the rodeo weren’t looking too great. The temperature was 90+ degrees, it was VBS week at our church so we were all exhausted, I had a terrible migraine, so we were thinking maybe we better sit this one out. After a bit of back and forth, we decided it’s a once a year thing and we were going, so we packed a bunch of water, were prepared for the reality that we may have to come right back home and made the drive to the county fair.

We got there, looked at all the livestock, let our kiddos see some of the entries of their friends and then found some seats to watch the rodeo. Now the rodeo was awesome. So cool. My kids loved it, it was entertaining, they mixed it up with barrel racing, bull riding and cattle roping. There was a portion of the show where the kids got to go out and have the opportunity to race and try to win a bike. But that wasn’t the best part of the show. To me, the best part of the show, was where all these HARD working men and women and children…these hillbillies, people call them. These families who have children who are disciplined enough to rise early and feed and care for animals, work on projects like cooking, sewing, training animals and building . They stood for the flag, they sang the national anthem together, they prayed together. They stood in silence and honored men and women who have served in the military together. They stood and honored men and women who are serving as police officers together. It brought tears to my eyes. All these people had to get up the next day and go to work and do life, but they were brought together by this commonality. They were proud to be American, they were praying together and honoring those who were serving together. It wasn’t a holiday, it’s just what they do because it’s right. That’s why I like spending time at the county fair around hillbillies, hard-working American families…..love them. They were there that night just being themselves because they don’t know how to be anything else.

Land that I love <3

If tomorrow all the things were gone I’d worked for all my life

And I had to start again with just my children and my wife

I’d thank my lucky stars to be livin’ here today

‘Cause the flag still stands for freedom and they can’t take that away

And I’m proud to be an American where at least I know I’m free

And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that right to me

And I’d gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today

‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land

God bless the USA

From the lakes of Minnesota, to the hills of Tennessee

Across the plains of Texas, from sea to shining sea

From Detroit down to Houston and New York to LA

Well, there’s pride in every American heart

And it’s time we stand and say…

Dear God,

Thank you for Independence Day. Thank you for the joy that fireworks bring. Thank you that because of the sacrifices of so many brave, selfless men and women my children are able to ride their bicycles freely in the streets without fear, I’m able to go for early morning runs, and I attended the church of my choice this morning. God bless America. Thank you that my husband and many family members and friends have served in our military because they wanted to and you have protected them, please be near those families who have soldiers that didn’t return home. Thank you for the freedom You gave us through forgiveness; God bless America; please now more than ever, stand beside her and guide her with your light.

-Amen

Summer camp as a military wifey-part 2

If you had read my last post you might have seen that the first half of my husband’s summer AT went pretty flawlessly. We started off by spending some time in a hotel, were busy with extra curricular activities for the kids and then I was fortunate enough to end that first week with a night out for my 30th birthday. I spent it with 10 of my good girlfriends going out to dinner and dancing. Sounds awesome right?

military

Well….if you are a military spouse, or a spouse to anyone who travels for that matter, you would know that anything that can go wrong when your husband is away will. So just wait for it, it’s coming. Usually for me this involves something pretty minor, a dryer that stops working during drill weekend, a flat tire while he’s away, the kitchen sink stops draining, something just enough to annoy me but not a complete emergency. Honestly, what causes more of a problem is my reaction rather than the actual issue. I always wondered if there was some kind of support system available for families of active duty soldiers as they are away so often. I remember when my husband was deployed to Iraq there was a chain of command for things like that but I was a lowly army girlfriend/fiancé which pretty much meant nothing back then. ( I did NOT appreciate that as you can tell!) From my perspective it seemed like there was some kind of system in place for those wives to get help if they needed it.

Ok, back to week 2. This started off pretty well. I had a 2 day leadership conference at our church that I was really looking forward to. We were going to be looking ahead to see how we could meet the needs of the community and I was honestly just honored to be a part of it. If you have a group of people working together to make a positive change in the world, I’m in, every time. I had no idea what to expect but after getting started, the whole weekend had a college feel to it and I loved it. I was good at college, mostly because of my personality, but it was exciting to be back in that atmosphere. I was glad to be a part of something bigger than myself that was really moving forward. Exciting and exhausting. Saturday night my family had a cookout and I showed up there and couldn’t stop yawning, I was just out of it. I think the entire week just smacked me right in the face. If my mom wasn’t having the cookout in honor of my brother’s birthday and my own, I honestly would have stayed home with my kiddos, snuggled in, put something like Despicable Me on and went to bed early.

And then the devil invites himself in…

Several times at that cookout I thought to myself, ” Oh my goodness, I can’t keep my eyes open one more minute.” Then I glanced over at my little man, as happy as can be, and he starts throwing up…nasty curdled milk all over. Now, he had done this Thursday night too, right after a bottle, and here you’re thinking what a bad mommy I am for taking my children out still after this. But hold up a minute, because at this age, all of my children have had pretty bad milk allergies, so I chalked it up to that, figured we needed to look into soy milk since he was acting fine otherwise and we went along with our night. No more than half an hour later, my oldest daughter asks to take a shower, her belly hurts terribly and she says that always helps. Sure, why not, I’m barely awake anyways.

Into grandma’s shower she goes, comes out, throws up on the lawn. I apologize to my mom for making her cookout’s atmosphere and yard look like a frat party and we load up and head home. For the record, my family doesn’t get sick. Of course we have gotten sick. But never all at once and it doesn’t just hit us out of nowhere like this. My poor babies were throwing up in their sleep. Several times during the night, like 3-4 times each. I had to wake them for them to realize what they were doing. It was absolutely terrible. I wouldn’t wish it up on anyone. We spent the next few days with fevers, sleeping next to buckets, trying to keep Gatorade down, and just as we thought we had recovered, it came right back. I was too worried to leave the house because just as soon as all of us were well for half a day, someone would become sick again. There was no rhyme or reason to any of it. I was too ill to even take care of my babies, which has never happened to me. It completely felt like I was under attack, I was desperate for help. There was just no way I could function for my children . I hate when times like these happen when he’s away it’s like the devil is trying to dangle it right in front of you….”See Jami…he chose the army over you, there is nothing that will make him come home to help you.”

“Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes”

Ephesians 6:11

WHOA….See how easily that lie can slip right in there? I’m tired, hungry, I miss my husband, I want him home, I’ve been cleaning up the puke of 3 children x 4 per night PLUS my own!. Let me ask you if you are at that point to stop yourself right there. Your husband can’t come home to deal with your situation and you making him feel terrible isn’t going to do either one of you any good. I know because I’m pretty sure I’ve tried that method about 6 years ago 😉 Maybe more than once. I’m truly sorry, but he just can’t. Yep, it sucks. The balance of becoming independent yet still confident that your husband has your back can be extremely tricky to navigate.

mtb

The final countdown: I LOVE when it gets to the point where we are counting down rather than looking at the number of days we have completed. Yesterday it was gorgeous outside so we all got out for a bit, but our yard seems to be overrun with wasps and these huge bumblebees. No big deal, we transported the sidewalk chalk to the front yard and followed the instructions on pinterest to create a wasp trap. We’ll have to check out if it was successful later today! It felt refreshing to be outside. After they all got to bed, I came in and started adding to this blog and guess what I saw….in the month of May…inside my kitchen. A freakin’ mouse. Are you kidding me?! I know I’m being negative here, but is this a joke?! Yes, yes it is. It’s not even cold outside mouse, why are you in here?! I hope it gets the flu and dies right now. I’m pretty independent, almost too independent…but let me tell you a few things I NEED my husband for…1.killing insects that overtake my children’s playground like wasps when it’s completely beautiful outside, 2. killing mice that must be insane because why would they come inside when it’s almost summer?! 3. Fixing the wheel on my running stroller that I think is broken, or crooked or doing something that makes it almost tip over when I turn corners every time I take my kids for a walk. At least we are entertaining the neighborhood. 4. Changing the light bulbs that aren’t normal and have tiny gray numbers on them and come from aisles in the store I don’t even know exist. (I need him for way more than that but I’m just sayin’) Good grief how many hours are left at this point?! I need like the red countdown ticker clock in my kitchen. We’re almost there!

24 hours to go: The mouse is dead!!! Mouse trap was a success! Pinterest wasp recipe was a big waste of time. My angels of nieces gave me a flower yesterday and it made my day. I haven’t had time to plant my own this year (one of my favorite things to do in May) and I was happy to relax outside with them in the sun for the day and chat with their mama. The day before daddy comes home is usually spent cleaning and “getting ready”. I like my hubby to come home to a place where he can relax. We’re not trying to pull the shades over his eyes, the man does live here the rest of the year, it’s just nice for him to be able to walk in the door and not feel stressed out. Sometimes if we’re really feeling ambitious, we do sidewalk chalk welcome home or make cards, prepare his favorite meal, or some other fun stuff. But other years, getting the house cleaned is all we can handle. We’ll see how it works out this year!

Overall, we’ve been doing this military couple thing as boyfriend/girlfriend, fiancés, wife/husband, and now family for 12 years and it’s constantly changing as we do. On my side of things summer camp has become easier in ways and more difficult. Easier because now that we have children time flies by. When it was just me, I sat around being lonely just waiting for him to come home, knowing your spouse is surrounded by people and you are feeling left behind can be heartbreaking. However, being at home with 3 children isn’t a breeze either! Running a household has so many responsibilities. Knowing your spouse is getting uninterrupted sleep and free time while you are going a mile a minute can be frustrating! It can feel like you are the one at a training camp sometimes. Funny how life changes isn’t it?

Be sure to communicate with each other and take those small blessings when they come. Pray, ask for the support you need, be appreciative of the phone calls you get, give your children a little more grace when their daddy is gone and make a big deal when he gets home…every single time.

Here are a few ways my family and friends blessed me while my hubby was gone:

Time: I really was appreciative of my friends spending the day with me for my birthday. I genuinely had so much fun with them. They are all so different and just wonderful. They are incredibly busy women, so the fact that they made me a priority was so kind of them!
Day trips: We took an end of the year day trip with my mom to build a bear and a zoo nearby that’s the perfect size for my little ones. The weather wasn’t too hot yet so we could walk around without worrying about a sunburn or the little guy overheating.
Chores: My in-laws just stopped by one day and mowed the lawn. This is a chore I actually love to do. I like to put my ipod in and get away for a bit, but this year it’s not happening. My baby is too little and I haven’t been able to make it work with the rainy weather in combination with my kids being sick for an entire week. This was such a blessing.
What do you need? For so many years this question brought on a lot of guilt for me. I was grateful for all the friends I had that offered to help out. We had one family bring us some Pedialyte early on a Sunday morning (the have 3 children of their own so I know they were busy before church!) and many others ask if we needed anything. The fact that they were willing to help meant so much to me.
Rest: Like I mentioned, I was too ill to care for my kids. This has never happened to me before but I needed rest. I was completely thankful to have family come over so I could sleep.
Little surprises: You know those people you choose to bring into your family? I just adore them. After we had been sick quite a few days I was out feeding the dogs and my girls walked out to find this on our back door:

Talk about being Jesus to someone. I love that my children got to see faith in action and someone was acting it out towards them. This was so cool. Never doubt that small actions can make a big difference, especially in the life of a child. A few days later, another close family friend dropped by to visit and gave my kiddos cookies and cupcakes. Just being thoughtful means so much. At different points during the week we also had family bring my fave coffee and drop off juice boxes for the kids.

Thanks to military families everywhere who do all kinds of adjusting constantly in order to support their soldiers who sacrifice for our country. Don’t lose hope.

But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:31

Thanks for taking a peek into our life as a military family. We wouldn’t change it for anything. It’s made us stronger, appreciative of one another and has grown our faith in more ways than we could have ever imagined. Have a fantastic weekend!

Summer camp for a military wifey -part 1

I always thought it would be interesting to give a military wife’s perspective of a deployment. Not after it was over but as it was going on. I think it would be great for people to see, an honest view of what a family goes through during a deployment, not negative, just real. My husband has deployed to Iraq for over a year when we were engaged and then to Africa for about 6 weeks when we had 2 little ladies both 2 years and under. Both deployments were difficult in their own ways. Other than that he has attended several schools and trainings for the military; all of which I am extremely grateful for. They have made him into an excellent leader and he wouldn’t complain to you for one second about any of it. That doesn’t mean his time away hasn’t been difficult for me and his kiddos at times.

Each summer he leaves for 2 weeks for Annual Training. In our world it’s AT. I tried my best to capture for you what this is like for us . Here’s a snapshot of life as a military family of a hero in the National Guard. This means we do not live on a base and hopefully most of the people in our community have no idea my husband is gone and I like it that way!

2 weeks out: This is when I start to get pretty anxious. If I’m perfectly honest with you, from here until the second he walks out the door, I’m pretty much nauseous. The feeling where you think you are pregnant. Not totally sick, just nauseated. I’m overwhelmed thinking of everything I have to do on my own for 17 days (yes I know exactly how many days). At the same time I’m trying to enjoy the fun things we are doing to celebrate hanging out with daddy before he leaves. I try to schedule as much as possible to stay busy while he’s gone.

2 days before until leaving day: This year he had drill right before AT. So we packed up early. Packing is always bittersweet with kids. I’m actually kind of shaky as I type this. I have helped my husband pack to leave so many times. 10 years now. I guess it’s kind of a ritual for us. We head to Walmart to grab things like razors, shaving cream, Q tips, and whatever else he needs and then we come home and see what kids will fit into his bags. He always pretends he’s going to sneak them into his bag so they can go with. And those bags are so huge I’m pretty sure all my little ones could fit. It always takes me right back to him leaving for Iraq. And then it takes me to the fact that there is always a possibility of that happening again and him having to leave his babies and I can’t stop it. It’s scary stuff for me. It’s funny that this is all going through my head and he’s simply packing to go 🙂 I love that when he packs he teaches his kids all about his life in the army. Our little red asked “Daddy did you take this to war?” as he got his helmet out. He told them stories of the nights he had to wear his helmet to bed because it was too dangerous to go to sleep without it. The girls think it’s awesome, I’m having a freakin panic attack! They cleaned off his goggles that had dust on them still from the desert, it was really fun to watch them experience that with him and be anticipating what he would tell them next!

Days 1-5: The first few days my kiddos and I went on a trip with family to Lake Geneva. I hadn’t planned on taking them as it was a ladies trip but when AT got moved this seemed like the best option. Fun for them, and less chaos and moving about of children. It was going to be difficult enough for me to get my 2 labs to a doggie sitter and pick them up plus I like to keep my babies close when my hubby is gone. The trip was wonderful and my kids had a blast, plus my family blessed me with some time alone to run which I was extremely appreciative of since I don’t know how often I’ll get to go over the next few weeks. What I wasn’t expecting was what hit me when I came home. I had cleaned the house really well, I love coming home to a clean house. My kids slept the whole way, I picked up the dogs, we made it in a decent time, but then…..nobody was here. It made me really sad to not have my best friend to tell all about the trip. I have never been the girl who has a best friend AND a husband. He’s it. As I’ve gotten older I do have some amazing girl friends. But throughout my life my husband has absolutely been my very best friend. We genuinely like to hang out, we’ve been blessed that we have a lot of the same interests and are just buddies. There wasn’t anyone else I thought of calling to tell about our experiences over the weekend, I was just sad. I knew he wasn’t coming home anytime soon. It really bummed me out. I have friends I could’ve called, but I didn’t want to. I hadn’t expected that to happen so it just shocked me a little…okay a lot. I ordered the girls pizza, did the walk through of the house I do when he’s gone like 5 times, locked the gate, double locked all the doors and went to bed.

When I woke up the next morning, I realized I left the spare key inside the back door, literally inside. As in, you could have turned the key and walked in. Good Lord! Thank God for a new day right?! The next few days were a bit emotional for my middle lady. She is always the first to really miss her daddy. She’s the cute crier. Her lips start to quiver and she has these beautiful big brown eyes that start to water. One night she tried to stay up and wait for daddy to come home. I think this is the first time he has been gone where she has a bit of a more tangible concept of time. Her little heart was just broken.

Our oldest had her end of the year gymnastics show; it was cool to experience her shining in spite of her daddy not being able to make it. She had so much support from good family and friends and she had no doubt in her mind that her daddy would be there if he was able to. I don’t think it’s a bad thing for children to know that their parents can’t always drop everything for them.

So, if you’ve been paying attention, at this point, we’ve spent 2 days in a hotel, which means 2 long days of driving back and forth. We have also spent one night at a gymnastics show and we also have an integral part of our family missing. The weather in our area has been a bit chilly and rainy as well. So we have been stuck inside. Usually when he has been gone a week, it’s a breaking point. I either feel like I’m going to go insane, or we are getting into a bit of a routine. I don’t know that this time I felt as if we were in a routine, because that isn’t the case, but a bit of the anxiety was released and I thought to myself, okay….for the next 10 days I can let my circumstances determine my attitude or I can change my attitude to fit the tone that I would like my day to follow. Because the fact that my husband is gone is not changing and there are 3 little ones who are watching how I handle this situation very closely. Luckily for me, I have done this before and I happened to plan myself a super fun 30th birthday party smack dab in the middle of this summer AT 😉

About a month prior I had invited 15 of my friends to go on a party bus out to dinner and to a country line dancing club. Something I had never done before. I wanted to do something fun for my birthday and I knew this would be the point during AT that I would need it. I was completely looking forward to it because:

1. I have never had such a great group of girlfriends

2. I have never been to a line dancing club.

3. I’m usually way too anxious for party busses and have to drive myself places so the fact that I was actually going to follow through with this was huge.

4. I haven’t been away from my kids for this amount of time with girls ever…meaning, EVER.

Needless to say, we had the best time. I love women who can go out, have a good time and not take themselves too seriously. One of my friends planned some games for the drive to dinner and she asked each of the girls what their first memory and impression was of me and it was so sweet to hear their responses. Most of all because they were honest. Just something that I really needed to hear. There’s something to choosing the people you let into your life and making the investment to cherish them and keep them there. It may have taken me 30 years to figure it out but I’m blessed to have some fantastic women in mine.

If at this point you’re thinking

A. She is only writing about the good things that happen when a spouse is gone, please read part 2 which I’m working on right now, as I’ve been spending the past week cleaning sheets, carpet and couches non stop because my entire family including myself has somehow contracted the flu during the month of May!!!

B. She has no idea what it’s like to be the wife of an active duty soldier, you’re right, I don’t, and God bless you. We spend a lot of time in this house hold praying for you. I can’t imagine how you do this all the time. I am so grateful for you and the sacrifices you and your family continuously make for our freedom.

Week 1, not too bad!

God I pray that you would mold me into the wife that my husband needs me to be.

Military prayer

My husband was asked to pray for the military on the National Day of Prayer which was May 5th so we worked together to write a prayer for the military. I just thought as Memorial Day is this month it would be worth sharing. Thank you to all the men, women and families who serve, are serving and have served in our military. We appreciate you! Also, we think it’s SO very important to thank our Veterans and take the time to ask them about their experiences and then be sure to listen. They won’t be here forever. If you don’t have anyone you can pass this prayer along to, at least take the time to say it at some point this month. Have a wonderful weekend!

Dear God,

We want to express our gratitude for those you have called to serve our country. Thank you for their sacrifices, perseverance and determination as they train and prepare to deploy. Thank you for the families and friends that provide the constant support needed for a soldier to thrive. Bless those who are here tonight. We come to ask for your protection over our soldiers defending this great country. We pray for those stationed in the United States and deployed overseas. Help them to stand united under strong leadership. Stay close to them as they complete missions and keep them focused on their goals. Give all leaders wisdom, even when they are in dangerous situations and under intense pressure. Keep the enemy far from them. Be with their families when they are away. Give them full faith in you and the patience they need to endure. Keep marriages strong and grounded in You. We also pray for the many Veterans in this country that have willingly served our great nation. Give them a sense of purpose in You and help them to share their experiences and wisdom with others. Let them never feel disrespected of forgotten. Lastly, we want to thank you that we live in America, where we can freely serve You. Thank you for sending Your son to die on the cross so that we can truly be free.

In His name we pray,

Amen.

True love

My husband and I didn’t have any huge plans for Valentines Day specifically this year and we usually don’t. If we can get out for a night alone somewhere in February that usually counts as Valentines Day. I think it’s fun to celebrate but we aren’t huge on it around here. This year we had quite a few plans and it was awesome for me to take the time to look back and be aware of the different ways love presented itself in our lives over the weekend.

My cousin is a photographer. (Check out her work here) She’s pretty amazing at it, and she asked her sister and I this past week if we could get all the kids together for Valentines pictures. She took it upon herself to order shirts that would work well together and invited us over to her home for a photo session with 8 children; ranging in age from 4 months-6 years. It was wonderfully crazy. Babies spitting up, crawling out of pictures, little girls dying to change into play dresses rather than their outfits and candy hearts all over the place. We had so much fun and I LOVE the pictures she took. So display of love #1 for my weekend: generosity. She gave her talent and time freely so we could get priceless photographs of our children and I am so appreciative of it.

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Hanafin Valentine's Day 2016-20.jpg

Friday afternoon I was invited to a new friend’s home for a Valentines party for the kiddos. It was nice to get out of the house and with homeschooling, I love an opportunity to give my children holiday parties that they miss out on at the public school. We were all excited to go. When we arrived there were crafts, snacks, drinks, cupcakes to decorate and valentines to pass out. My children were able to play and were full of joy making themselves at home here. This is a rarity when my little ones are in a place for the first time. Usually we have about half an hour of not leaving mommy’s side. I love that they were so comfortable here and that this mama had a home that was completely welcoming. Then, as if her hospitality wasn’t enough, we were packing up and she hands me a white bag with cute red paper mache sticking out of the top to take home. Inside I found a box of fine tipped markers, an adult coloring book, and some chocolates. How incredibly sweet and thoughtful?! The fact that she welcomed my children into her home and treated them with kindness made me love her forever, then she gave me a gift as I left as well, so thoughtful. Act of love for the weekend #2: hospitality and random acts of kindness.

Now the big plans for the weekend. We have family friends that we love to travel with. Our children are like siblings and we can relax when we are together. We wake up in the morning, have coffee together, slowly get ready and nobody is in a rush, it’s fantastic. So, all needing to get out, we scheduled a trip to the Dells for the weekend. My husband and I were unsure as the weekend was packed with events that we had planned on attending, but we needed it. We hadn’t been on vacation in almost 2 years and a weekend away sounded awesome. Now you should know that my husband has a new-ish job for the state which means if it snows, he works. We weren’t too concerned as we have had the mildest winter of our lives it seems like, but wouldn’t ya know…..it was supposed to snow this weekend. As we are preparing to leave Saturday morning my husband decides he should drive separately in case he gets called in. (This is a huge bummer for me because one of my favorite parts of any trip is the car ride, especially when he and I get to chat/sing the whole way) We finally arrived at the Wilderness Resort and were able to meet up with our friends, check in and get going. We spent the day on water slides, bumper boats and walking what seemed to be miles in this huge resort! Back at the room, cozy clothes were put on, fireplace lit, and pizza ordered. It was a fantastic start to the weekend. The next morning, the hubby got called in, which I knew would happen but still stunk! He went down in the below zero temps and the car he brought wouldn’t start. The battery was dead. He comes back to our room, lets me know he’s switching cars and the car seats and coats will be there for me. I wake up early with my little man, put the girls’ valentines gifts on their pillows as they sleep and prepare for the day. We head to do pottery with the oldest kids on the trip while friends watch my babe. As we arrive back at our room I’m thinking I should track down my debit card for the day. Nowhere to be found. I call Clint and he says he checked several times it’s not in his wallet, he assumed it was in mine. So, 3 hours away, he checks in my van on the floor and guess what’s there? I am now at a resort with my 3 children, a car with a dead battery and no money. Now, this could have been a complete disaster, but remember who we were traveling with? Amazing people. They helped with my children, jumped the car, paid for our dinner….without a complaint. What I so much appreciate is none of this was necessary, we had snacks that we could have eaten and I could’ve taken all my kiddos with me for the rest of the trip, it would’ve been nuts, but I could do it. Their kindness and unselfishness on a trip that was for their family as well is something my family will never forget. Act of love #3: friendship that looks like family.

friend

Now, the final act that I don’t think gets the attention it deserves. Was our trip a bit frustrating? Yes. Did we make the best of it? Yes. But let me tell you why I made the choice to not get worked up about our circumstances. It was extremely unfortunate that my kids didn’t get to hang with daddy during the trip they had so been anticipating. I felt terrible borrowing money from friends unexpectedly and getting their help with our vehicle. In the midst of our being in a waterpark all weekend my husband who worked hard to pay for it all, didn’t get to enjoy the trip he had looked forward to. He drove home early in the morning with little sleep to work an almost 24 hour shift. And if he doesn’t complain about that then I surely don’t have grounds for anger. Disappointment…yes, anger…no. Act of love #4: perseverance. This is the daily act in a marriage. Working together through everything and not taking each other for granted. Realizing when something is off and working together to fix it. Learning from your mistakes and being stronger for it. For example….don’t plan a trip in the winter if your husband drives a snow plow, even if it was 50 degrees the week before 😉

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13:7

Christmas traditions

I love the Christmas season, I really do. It seems like the rest of the world cherishes family time and tends to have a more appreciative attitude in general. It seems like every place I go, people are just a bit kinder than they have been the previous 11 months of the year. Strangers hold doors open for you, cars let you pass them, people give bigger tips at restaurants, there’s just a different mentality this time of year.

Usually the week of Christmas is really exciting for me, I love wrapping the presents, spending time with family, enjoying the lights and decorations, experimenting with new recipes with my ladies in the kitchen, but this year a member of my family is trying to devastate my week! You may have heard about this handsome little guy whom I adore. I have this sweet, stud muffin of a son who is 8 months old. 8 months old and teething. This is how our household has been functioning …and mind you it is nothing like how either of my girls behaved while teething of course! Little man thinks he doesn’t require sleep and when he does sleep he wakes often screaming. That painful scream babies have that breaks your heart. He has just enough of a fever for me to keep checking it to make sure it isn’t getting super high. My week has been consumed with mid night baths attempting to cool him down, alternating Motrin and Tylenol, singing lullabies, teething rings, frozen washcloths, walking around the house bouncing, feeling like I’m threatening my girls if they aren’t able to remain silent for the small chunks of time that he sleeps, and A LOT of coffee. So, I’m completely drained. I’m like putting the cereal box in the fridge exhausted. Last night or this morning…I think 4 am-ish he finally seemed content. I was downstairs to ensure the rest of my family was sleeping peacefully upstairs (one grouchy baby is bad enough, no need to add 2 grouchy children and a husband who has worked all day with no sleep) and my baby and I were rocking on the chair my mother in law gave us. I love the sound old rocking chairs make, the creaking of the wooden rods that other mommies have heard before you when they rocked their babes to sleep is soothing to me. It’s just like the sound of wooden floor in an old home when you are swaying with your baby in your arms. Something about that always comforts me. As we were rocking, I looked around my living room at the soft glow of the tree, our nativity set lit on the shelf and it was wonderfully still. I sang “Away in a Manger” to my little man and I stared at him envisioning baby Jesus sleeping just as soundly and I felt peaceful , I was thankful for the lack of sleep that helped me to appreciate that moment.

Then 6:30 came. My youngest daughter was in the bathroom calling me and she woke up the beast. Two and a half hours is the most solid sleep I’ve had in a week. I was not happy he had been woken up because in my head I was holding onto a hope of all my children resting until 10am without an issue. (For the record, my family never sleeps past 7….ever) I was irritated to say the least. I told my girls not to move and went downstairs, put my little guy by his toys, went in the kitchen, made my coffee and took a minute to regroup. It’s the week of Christmas and I was not going to let my fatigued attitude ruin the day. The ladies came downstairs, turned on Disney Junior and I opened my Bible while my children ate breakfast. My day is always more intentional and focused when I take time to do this in the morning.

“This calls for patient endurance on the part of the saints who obey God’s commandments and remain faithful to Jesus”. Revelation 13:12

Hmmmm patient endurance. That sounds like something I need in my life this week. Funny how God had advice prepared long ago as He knew this day would happen.

So traditions…see how I get off topic? I’m running on coffee here and my baby is gnawing away at a toothbrush on my lap. Here are some of our favorite Christmas traditions around here.

Letting our children pick out Christmas ornaments. It’s always fun to see what they think is beautiful and fits their personality.
Cuddling on the couch watching Christmas movies ( my fave is “It’s a Wonderful Life”)

Sledding/snowmobiling/shoveling if there’s snow!
We spend a day cleaning our home together then getting our decorations out and placing them all over the house.

My husband takes the girls shopping for me and I take them for him. They are so thoughtful in their choosing of gifts and we have fun with it. This year we tried to buy my husband a live chick but the store said we had to get a minimum of 6. NOT HAPPENING.
Making cookies. My daughter shares my affinity for throwing parties. This year she begged me to have a cookie/PJ party. We invited my nieces, nephews and Grandma. I’m incredibly grateful for the conversations that arise from time spent with my grandma. We had a lot of fun imagining her at the swimming pool in a classy bikini, even if it was inappropriate! 😉

Military Christmas: Each year the unit my husband is in has a Christmas party for the families. It’s neat for my children to get a glimpse of what their daddy does each month when he goes away and I like that they see the respect amongst the soldiers as they do formations and clean up after the party. I’m always so proud when my husband introduces my girls to a soldier and they are polite and able to hold a conversation with them.

my babies

love

Yes we know he’s missing a bar, yes we found it!

Christmas Eve at Grandma and Grandpas: This is the one tradition I’ve had my entire life. It’s a cozy, happy, fun night filled with food, games, family and friends.
Christmas morning: The world stops here. This is our sacred family time. We slow down, open gifts, eat a yummy breakfast together and get ready to travel to our destination when we are ready. I cherish this morning so very much.

I pray that whatever your plans are this week, if things get crazy and stressful, or you become exhausted from the busyness, that you would remember to ask for patient endurance, give yourself a second to regroup and grab a cup of coffee while you’re at it! Merry Christmas!

PS- We love starting new traditions around here, so please share any fun ideas you have! We are not interested in ideas that involve lack of sleep for mommies or babies. 🙂

Thank you

The military is a pretty big part of my life and has been for over 10 years now. I have a box of letters my husband wrote me while he was in basic training and AIT back before cell phones were readily available. I would run down each day from my dorm room at NIU and check that teeny tiny mailbox with my key for a letter. I remember one time he got leave for the weekend and I drove alone 16 hours straight to South Carolina just to see him for 24 hours.

We have absolutely learned how valuable time together is and to not take that for granted. During our first 3 years of dating he was gone for about 2 of them, between basic, AIT and a deployment. The military changed us both forever, we became stronger, more patient, appreciative, learned we needed to depend on God and that He was faithful, and decided we weren’t going to let go of what we had together. Needless to say, Veterans Day is a big deal to me. There are men in my family who have served in the military and now of course countless friends. So if you have served…

-Thank you for giving up time with your family and friends in order to protect mine.

-Thank you for all the effort you put into training so that you are ready at a moment’s notice.

-Thank you for working as a team, supporting one another.

-Thank you for your focus during a mission.

-Thank you for those who have given their lives for our freedom in this amazing country.

-Thank you to all the families who keep it together for their soldiers, children, families…

-Thank you for being men and women that have values my children can look up to.

-Thank you for the respect you seem to have for anyone you encounter.

-Thank you for wearing that uniform with pride.

-Thank you, that because of all you do, I’m able to play outside with my children with no fear. I’m convinced we are incredibly spoiled in this country. I realize this is the only life I’ve known but I can’t imagine it any other way, and I thank you for that.