I’ve lost it. . .

If you were to receive an email from me you would see a quote at the bottom.  “You were made to fill a purpose only you could do.” I truly believe in those lyrics from a Christian song by Johnny Diaz.  We were each creating so uniquely, how could you not believe that?  You were knitted together to do complete a specific job, specific to your talents, your looks, your environment, I know that to be true.  But somehow recently I lost it.  For the longest time my purpose was to be a teacher, even as a child I knew I was created for that specific career.  Then I did, for 6 years I gave teaching everything I had and I loved it.  Was it stressful? Yes. Was it difficult? Yes.  Was it a blast? Yes. Slowly, I started to lose my passion for teaching and that’s when I knew something had to change.

Life lesson #1: Just because something is easy for you doesn’t mean it’s always what you should do. 

Life lesson #2: Don’t be a teacher if you aren’t passionate about it, you are impacting our future!

  Enter running…see that section of my page to learn more about my journey with this.  Most recent running challenge: half marathon.  I trained for about 6 months, watched my diet, ran almost daily and worked diligently to complete a race I never imagined I could even begin.  The following summer I made a huge decision to focus on my family and stay home, we were thrilled to be expecting a baby boy! April 2015, my first son arrives. It felt a bit like my life had been this…

Become a teacher….check

Get a Masters degree…check

Run a half marathon…check

Have a baby boy…check (I didn’t realize what a big deal this was to people after 2 girls, goodness! What’s so wrong with baby girls?!)

And here I am, feeling lost.  And it’s not for lack of things to do.  And who says I can’t create a new goal?  The problem I have right now is that the things that happen between or I guess amongst my small goals are ruining my overall goal.  Sick family members, disagreements, not feeling quite back to my pre baby self, are contributing to my misplacing the purpose God has laid out for me.  The one He created for me and created me for.  I have no doubt that I was made to be a strong support for my husband, to raise the children God has given us according to His will all while showing mercy and encouraging others. For some crazy reason I felt I couldn’t achieve my goals by being….wait for it…”just a mom“.  Who even came up with that phrase?! It’s completely ridiculous.  In a conversation I had recently a woman was asking me about my life and towards the end of our discussion she looked at me with this excitement and joy in her eyes and she said “So, you did all that school to be a teacher and you are using it to teach your own children?! That’s awesome.” And I thought, yes…..it is pretty awesome, being “just a mom” at home is pretty awesome.

Hanafin2

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank you for the opportunity to be just a wife and mom.  I’m up for the challenge.

  • – Jami

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